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London 2 League Play-Off
National Treasure, National Anthem, National Trust, The
Grand National, National Service, National Express, National
League 3 London and South East
Simply
Magnificent
Clarkey’s Dad made the longest journey on the day. The round
trip from Stockton Heath (it’s the posh bit of Warrington)
to Staines and back is probably a touch over four hundred
miles. For many others ponying up at The Reeves in Staines
on Saturday it had been a fifteen-year slog since Odd Job
and the original War Horse last ‘graced’ London One. It was
certainly the culmination of the Soviet sounding five- year
plan to establish a level of league status to match the
enthusiasm and passion for rugby football in our wee small
part of the Surrey Hills. The build up had gone well. Jim
reported the boys looked awesome in training on Thursday and
we’d had Spreckers video analysis of at least the first
twenty minutes of the Staines-Diss game before the camcorder
battery eventually gave out. Staines were good, make no
mistake. Talk all week was of their high roller alumni; the
perma-tanned Chris Sheasby, the vaguely familiar Nick
Greenstock, and the apparently geographically challenged
Fijian sevens super star Serevi had all been on the team
sheet in recent memory as a result of a City bonus sized
playing budget. But crucially there was also plenty of
twittering about an over reliance on the two and four line
out jumpers. By Friday morning productivity was taking a
hammering. Messages of good luck were composed and
circulated, and Dorking numbers piled up for the pre match
lunch notwithstanding the budget bashing of fifty pence rate
of super tax affecting the cheese and port brigade. It was
becoming clear Promotion Saturday would involve one of the
most significant movement of personnel from Dorking and
District since the D-Day Landings.
By kick
off on Thorners’ reckoning over two hundred and fifty
Dorking members had gathered in hope and expectation to
witness the denouement to Mission Promotion launched at Old
Albanians in August. The Committee possee took up a tactical
position on the corner flag determined this time to maintain
composure and dignity regardless of the events and outcome
of the following eighty minutes. And boy did the boys
respond to the fabulous support. We took an early
psychological advantage with Catton, Buckland and Kelly
seriously disrupting the first home put in. But as predicted
it was the line out that was to become the front line.
Richie’s video analysis had pin pointed Staines’ Achilles
heel. From the bully off the Dorking game plan was made
plain: to attack the home line out. Ted and Ben crowded the
Staines’ jumpers resembling a claustrophobic bye gone era.
Throw in Wade Dooley’s flying elbows and we could well have
been back in the 80s. It certainly seemed to unnerve the
home team and Matt made sure the first twenty minutes was
all down the Staines end. From a line out deep in the corner
Staines got their first taste of ‘Arri taking several
defenders to drag him down before conceding a kickable
penalty. “He hits this one against the left upright” we
advised the Staines allickadoos as Lovey teed it up “Just to
find his range”. Not this time. Straight down the middle and
first blood Dorking. We were now beginning to find the
groove. Ted took the kick off athletically for Ben and Ryan
to set up Jason on a bid for the line. His chip and chase
looked good from our distant vantage point but was ruled in
touch by the thankfully restored Alex running the line.
Armand then turned up in the centre releasing Kempy with the
deftest of hands for another close call. Ryan then linked
with Ben Allard for a fifty-metre incursion. Clarkey went
close. We were well on top but bemoaning the fact we were
failing to put the game away with a sloppy final pass or
coughing up a penalty. “ Bit early to get too worried”
counselled Jim, “We’re normally fifteen points behind at
this point”. Wise words as Matt first swung it left and then
right forcing Staines to concede a second penalty which
Lovey took effortlessly doubling the lead. It’s not much of
an exaggeration to say that such was the level of control
this was the first point Staines made an appearance in the
Dorking quarter with playmaker Regan (definitely no
relation) manufacturing several threatening backs moves. As
the momentum stalled Vern put in a major hit and Kempy found
a sixty metre punt to safety, for good measure applying that
rare skill of making the ball take a sharp right turn to
touch on landing in the Staines twenty two. You can’t coach
that. Staines took the line out quickly only for the
clearing kick to be charged down. Fast hands and faster
support play and Allard crossed top the delight of The
Running Horses Colonel syndicate. Eleven nil at the interval
and you’ve got to say that probably flattered the hosts.
More of the same in the second and we would have an anxiety
free gallop to the national leagues. Or so we thought.
Uncharacteristically Matt put the restart straight out on
the full. Immediate possession to Staines seemed to restore
confidence and take the wind out of the Dorking sails.
Turner, Patrick and Landsburg in the Swans back row started
to become more prominent pressurising Ollie Cummings which
in turn gave Matt little time or space in which to work. A
catch and drive took Staines over the line but through the
efforts of Carloss and Catton not to the satisfaction of Mr
Cooper the match official. The respite was temporary as a
missed touch or two failed to relieve the pressure and
Staines worked their way over from a quick tapped penalty.
Regan added the extras. Now we had a contest.
Dorking
seemed to get the much-needed break when Landsberg the
Staines 8 was sin binned for stamping a country mile off the
ball. A four point and man advantage again restored
confidence, but without putting the game away. Juddy left
committee corner to pass on some personal advice to our sin
binned opponent. One to fifteen the defence was awesome. The
away crowd was lifted with several steals from an inspired
Ben Lucas and Teddy Watts; Ted took one Staines line out
with two hands. Spencer replaced Kempy and was immediately
in on the act with a fabulous follow up tackle. Increasingly
we found ourselves spending time in the Staines twenty-two
and when Mr Cooper awarded a routine penalty Lovey stepped
up to seal the game. “He kicks these for fun” we advised the
Staines executive committee, recalling the nerveless knock
that took the Old Leodensians Powergen semi into over time.
The kick shanked badly towards anxiety corner. We weren’t
making this easy. Mickey Wilmott on the Staines wing
frequently looked threatening as we started to debate the
reliability of Mr Cooper’s timekeeping. Taking matters into
his own hands Jason picked it up at the base and set off
bobbing and weaving through the disjointed defence and found
Spencer in support. This was the moment. The support was
arriving fast. All we needed was a slipped pass to Matt and
the chosen one would be under the sticks. Job done. In slow
motion Spencer looked to offload and turned to identify the
fast boys in support. To his obvious amazement he found the
unlikely figure of Ollie B approaching fast on his shoulder.
This wasn’t in the script. Mick Williams couldn’t watch.
Against all our expectations and at considerable pace Ollie
managed to get his out stretched arm to the ultimate prize
and knocked it up in the air ready to collect and cross for
the deciding score. We held our breath. Back to real time
Ben Kay like the ball bobbled and grazed Ollie’s fingertip
grasp and fell to the floor. “ I wanted to keep it
interesting until the very end,” Ollie offered
unconvincingly. Thankfully the end wasn’t long coming.
Skipper Armand carried it to the Staines twenty- two and
with the referee indicating time, appropriately vice captain
Ollie Cummings whacked it into the massed Dorking ranks.
Promotion secured.
Director of Rugby Richie Andrews reflected that on this
occasion the result inevitably meant more than the
performance, “That wasn’t the prettiest game of rugby I’ve
seen this season but rarely have I seen two teams who
refused to give up and who gave a hundred per cent from
start to finish. I am very proud of the Dorking players.
They showed great commitment and team spirit. It is not just
the squad involved on Saturday but every player that has
represented the first team this season. In fact it’s the
whole Club who thoroughly deserve this promotion. I am sure
they enjoyed their celebrations late into Saturday night.”
He
wasn’t wrong. Naked bus and then a naked bar. Jim and I felt
a bit self- conscious at first but we’d been promoted for
goodness sake.
Squad:
Ben Allard (The Running Horses - Colonel) Richard Kemp
(Running Horses - Cadland) Simon Love (Absolute Self
Storage) Rob Clarke (Chris Brown Electrical Limited) Ryan
Lucas (The Oven Gleaming Company) Matt Noble (Chris Brown
Electrical Limited) Ollie Cummings (Arty Ps Dorking) Armand
Roux (International Sports Marketing Limited), Ben Lucas
(Barber One Dorking) Jason Geldenhuys (W Songhurst Limited)
Ted Watts (Mrs Jane King) Rob Carloss (Gary Bell Esq.) Ollie
Buckland (The Black Horse Reigate) James Catton (JJ
Whispers, Reigate) Adam Kelly (Chris Brown Electrical
Limited)) Will Crowe( Reigate Grammar School) Julian
Bambridge (TBD) Luke Davis ( Epsom College) Spencer Richards
(The White Hart)
The
Chairman |
